How Do you feel today?

"Hi, how are you today?"

"Oh, I'm great. How are you? You look great! I love your haircut, who did you have do it?"

How many exchanges like this do we all have every day. How many times do you ever tell anyone how you really are?

I know I never did. I gave it my all to look like I was fine for so long when I wasn't that I forgot how it felt to be fine. I sometimes think that if I could have answered the question of "hi, how are you.?" honestly I would have never ended up into a place where I truly wasn't fine.

"Hi, how are you?"

"You know what? I am awful today. I feel lost, afraid, and alone 90 percent of the time, and the other ten percent I am trying to pretend that I am ok. Today I am as shittly as I ever have been. I feel like I am walking around in a thick dark fog that is going to swallow me up at any moment. So, thank you so much for asking how I am doing. How are you?"

Not many of us tell anyone including ourselves how we really are. I have had my life change so much in the last few years and one of the things that I am trying to do is be honest with myself on how I am, as well as having the courage to not be okay in front of others.

So, I am giving you permission within the confines of this site to not be okay when you are not. Let yourself be you with the feelings that you have. You are not bad, how you feel is not bad, and you are stronger than you tbink you are.

"HOW ARE YOU TODAY?"